Hello! I am back, people. It has been two months since my last blog and honestly, I didn’t even think about blogging. Then I looked on my app and saw how long it had been. Yikes. It’s mostly due to me just enjoying my (much needed) break from everything infertility. I had a nice long six months to mourn our IVF loss, and I am very happy that I took the time I needed. it was very therapeutic to not have to think about getting pregnant 24/7. That’s right. For the first time in years, I didn’t live and breathe getting pregnant. I didn’t cry when friends got pregnant, I didn’t wander the baby isles in Target (does anyone else do that or is it just me? haha) I just had fun and lived my life.
I got a new job! I was basically demoted from my previous position with AmierGas, not for doing bad at my job, but because they basically outsourced another department in Ohio to do my job, so I was no longer needed. I was very upset and felt very betrayed by the company I had worked for eight years. But, it worked out- within a month I found a much better job with another company! I have been with them for about a month now and it has been great! I am sad that I wont be working from home anymore, or have the same kind of flexibility, but I knew that it wasn’t always going to be like that!
We are all set for our January IVFx2. About a week ago I emailed Dr. Stephens and asked if I could have my prescription for meds sent to the pharmacy. This would ensure that I could call them and get the running total on how much money this would be costing us. Since I knew she planned on being aggressive with meds this go around, I wanted to prepare myself, financially and mentally. I gave myself 2-3 shots a day back in Aprils’ IVF but the dosages were pretty low since we knew from previous inseminations that I responded well to meds. When I did IVF the first time I was horribly bloated, sore and just straight up uncomfortable. Knowing that it is going to be worse this winter makes me very, very scared and nervous.
Anyways, she put in the meds, I got the call from the pharmacy and got the totals. Holy Shit. I could not even believe it, I asked the pharmacist to tell me what exactly the prescription called for and how much it costs. I will give you the very, very expensive breakdown:
- 5 boxes of Centrotide: $522.50
- 3 boxes of Gonal F 900iu pen: $1,908.00
- 4 boxes of Gonal F 350iu pen: $636.00
- 10 boxes of Menopur: $799.00
- 1 Pregnyl: $95.00
- 1 Lupron: $149.00
- Progesterone Support: $120.00
- Oral meds: $61.50
GRAND TOTAL: $4,291.00
Yeah, so that’s fine, right? LOL. That’s almost double what we spent in April. Pregnyl and Lupron are both used as trigger shots and I was confused as to why I needed two. When I emailed Dr. Stephens to ask her she told me it was to be used just in case I overstim, the Lupron would be used to keep me from developing OHSS. Oh ok, since I am using TEN boxes of Menopur I guess that’s good to have. I am hoping and praying that this does the trick. I know that more meds= more eggs=more retrieved=hopefully better fertilization rates=more chances for transfers. Dr. Stephens is very confident in this plan, and also not triggering as early as we did last time, so as to let my eggs mature another day or so. So I am glad to see she thought ahead of the Lupron.
Since we are roughly three months out, egg boot camp has also started. Which means back to swallowing 20 pills a day, more water than any other beverage consumed, and eating very, very healthy. I decided to forgo Acupuncture this time around. It was too expensive to do weekly, and I don’t think it helped me much besides relaxing me. I think I’d rather just get bi weekly massages instead!
I wish I could say that I am excited, I really could. The truth is, I am not at all excited. I am worried my eggs will betray me and I will be left exactly where I am now: not pregnant and 15k poorer. I am sure as it gets closer my attitude will change, but right now, the thought of doing IVF all over again terrifies me. I am just going to take it one day at a time, and do my best to relax and just not put all my hopes and dreams on the line. I want to be hopeful but ALSO be realistic.
Wish me luck! I will be updating more now that it is getting closer!
Have a great week xox